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Rayson

Rayson Ling



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© * étoile filante
inspiration/colours: mintyapple
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reference: x / x
title: Chapter 3: Story of a Robber / Missing bullets
date: Sunday, April 22, 2012
time: 4:46 PM
April 14th, 2012 Starting with Adi's party, supposed to be a birthday celebration for him, but he insisted it's just a party. So yeah, a party.. I invited you and you said no. Then the girls took my phone and called you, and you said you might be coming with a friend. Y'know I was really happy back then, that you were coming. When I head downstairs to fetch you and your friend up to the condo. I was really nervous and confuse, it's not the alcohol that made me that way, it's the sight of you. Back in the condo, I couldn't calm down, so I went to get some lemons for the tequila. Managed to calm down a little after a walk.

After sending your friend off, we lay on the benches to talk for almost 2 hours. That moment, I hope it would last longer.

April 17th, 2012 That story about the Robber really made my day. I was on the bus when I read it and burst out laughing. All the passengers were shooting weird looks at me. But I couldn't help it. It's so cute for an adult to make a mistake like this. I promise I'll keep it a secret..! For now..!

April 22nd, 2012 Saw the photos on your Facebook. How you hold hands and take pictures with that guy. Can't help but feel jealous.. But that's not the thing that matters the most. We talked about the things in Singapore that are more special, mostly the things I haven't tried. We didn't try the bungee jump on Valentine's because you're running late, words that we'll try it next time. Though it's not a promise and there are no obligations. But when we met the next time, you've already tried it with your friends. First, it's the bungee jump.. Then the ice-skating. You know.. I really want to experience these, first-hand with you. But you went there with your friends.. I was even wondering if you're doing it on purpose..

It really sucks to know and accept the fact that I'm only a friend to you. A typical, do-not-communicate, friend. When you're my life's, special one. It's enough to see that you're happy. But I can't help but want something, a little more attention, more chances to see you or... just something.

I pray, I hope, I wish that one day you'll feel the same as I do towards you. After the amount of time and your actions that hurt me without even realising it, it's like you've held a gun and unknowingly shot me, 1 time, 3 times, 5 times. It killed my expectations and the will to try. But I haven't lost hope, like a paralysed man trying to reach for a cup of water. I'll wait, still hoping that one day, that one day I'll be able to drink that glass of water.


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title: good times
date: Saturday, April 7, 2012
time: 2:04 AM
Got my fixie yesterday, got to say it's sexy!! Alright so when the bike is delivered, the thunderstorm started, so i couldn't go out for a test drive. But it ended really soon, so i managed to ride it eventually. Seriously!? Who said its fun to ride a fixie!? Rode it for awhile only, and my whole left palm got a cramp, the gear is rigid, so there's a lot of pressure used almost on every part of the body. Tough! But i think I will get use and learn to skid soon.

You texted me first yesterday...! Was really happy, but i kinda feel that you're just upholding your words.. that you'll contact me. Hope I'm wrong, and it seems that we have nothing to talk about most of the time.. It's awkward, and I can't fully express myself... But my love for you is genuine..

Hope today will be a great day, oh yeah, yesterday's party was fun! Hanging out with friends, have lots of fun together. Great times, won't forget. Except that when they get drunk... they just start spouting nonsense... Because of that I don't drink much. It's low class to lose control of yourself. And I just abid to their request, don't want any of them to get angry.

Guess that's all for now, staying at Guan Tian's tonight! This place is too damn far from my house and I don't wanna waste the taxi fare.


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