So hey blog. Past few days, well the good and bad events can compete, and I'm hanging in there. The three days when I was dizzy, I didn't perform well while working. So I got some exercise the following last day as Ah Wei said it may be due to too much rest. And the next day, I thought I performed pretty good. Yet, I kept getting reprimanded and endured some minor maligns. I bear it.. Told myself it's common..

Just wanna say this now and immediately. I just spent 80k cash, in less than 10 minutes. Left me in a daze till now. Spent 80 dollars and got nothing. It might not have left a big impact on me if it were a few weeks ago.. But now... The aftermath is this daze.. Makes me so tired.. Felt so wrong, wrong, wrong......

So today... I was asked to pay my school fees. Yeah and the bad news. My 1 month overdue phone bill came, SGD549. And yes, no allowance for a month. At that moment when I found out, I felt really hopeless, angry and the feeling of 'I really give up, really.' All the cursing starts rolling through my mind. About how I scold my father through sms, saying this saying that.. Serious, when I was sec 4, this thing happened. He did not ceased my allowance as I needa survive. Now, when he knows I'm working, he ceased my allowance, LIKE SO EASY, JUST DON'T GIVE, STOP GIVING YOU ALLOWANCE ANYTIME I WANT kinda fucked up thing. I am seriously losing it.... I wanna just cry.. breakdown.... But I keep telling myself, I'm a man, I'm a man, are you still gonna cry like some kid? Fucking get yourself up.

Solution... Thursday onwards.. I will have another part time at night... Yeah.. 8am work, 3pm school and 7pm work till 10pm. I'm made tough, I can definitely last it.



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